sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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