What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
