I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
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