Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Randomize
