The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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