Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
