I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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