Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
