That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize