I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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