Your tits are I can't wait for
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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