how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Randomize
