Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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