I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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