My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
