That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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