yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize