Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
