dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
