On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
