Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize