i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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