In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize