as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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