how hairy? two words: wookie tits
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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