The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
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