the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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