At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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