dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize