Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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