Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize