you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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