I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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