we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize