Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
