I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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