they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Randomize
