real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Girls should come with a carfax report
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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