awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize