it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Randomize
