porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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