Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize