i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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