You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
