Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize