Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize