She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Did I show you my penis last night?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
