I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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