real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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