Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
